|
I suggest that you watch more TV |
[Francine] |
|
If you're trying to get close to me |
[Beefy] |
|
My remote control |
[Francine] |
|
Is kept in my hole |
[archaeopteryx] |
|
Which explains why I'm mooning Aunt Bea
|
[Francine]
|
|
That vulgar Amiercan lady! |
[archaeopteryx] |
|
Her conduct's deplorably shady |
[Beefy] |
|
She kicks up her heels |
[Francine] |
|
Does rude things with eels |
[Beefy] |
|
And crude things to Father O'Grady
|
[Francine]
|
|
Your bathing's infrequent, at best |
[Kansas Sam] |
|
And your fragance is loaded with "zest" |
[Karin] |
|
These nose plugs I wear |
[Francine] |
|
When you prance about bare |
[Karin] |
|
Could do with the odd day of rest
|
[Grayman]
|
|
Dear, why did you spit in my tea? |
[Karin] |
|
I sense that you're upset with me |
[Francine] |
|
Was it something I said? |
[Beefy] |
|
Do you wish we weren't wed? |
[Karin] |
|
And why the large knife? Oh, I see ...
|
[Beefy]
|
|
Your knife is as dull as your wit |
[Kansas Sam] |
|
You'll have to try harder, you twit |
[Karin] |
|
And you're too fat to run |
[Francine] |
|
Yikes! That's a big gun! |
[Karin] |
|
So you're too dumb to hire a hit?
|
[Helen Owly]
|
|
Ha! It figures your shotgun would jam |
[Karin] |
|
'Cos you're just not as smart as I am |
[Grayman] |
|
Don't hurl that grenade! |
[Francine] |
|
'Til I pick up this spade |
[Grayman] |
|
Now, just hold the pin, there's a lamb
|
[Anon]
|
|
Well, it seems this grenade is a dud |
[Karin] |
|
You're the wabbit and I'm Elmer Fudd |
[Francine] |
|
Be vewy, vewy quiet |
[Karin] |
|
I warn you, don't try it |
[Beefy] |
|
Or believe me, your name will be mud
|
[Francine]
|
|
It wasn't like this when we met |
[Beefy] |
|
That day you got trapped in my net |
[Karin] |
|
You swore to be true |
[Francine] |
|
Though we were just two |
[Beefy] |
|
Naifs, behind the ears wet
|
[Francine]
|
|
When I first introduced you to Bea |
[Beefy] |
|
My mistress, a real V.I.P. |
[Francine] |
|
Heard Andy, her nephew, |
[Kansas Sam] |
|
Tell Helen, "I want you" |
[Anon] |
|
Which led to this catastrophe
|
[Beefy]
|
|
The moral of this untelevised story |
[archaeopteryx] |
|
Is that marriage isn't all glory |
[Francine] |
|
Unless Barney Fife |
[archaeopteryx] |
|
Was, in fact, Gomer's wife |
[Will H] |
|
As his poor jilted Sarge sobbed on "Maury" |
[Kansas Sam] |